Thundering claustrophobia sinks in.
You can't go into the cave! What if there are pale, naked mole people waiting for you? They might try and touch you! And you sure as hell don't have the upper body strength to climb out of here. Plus, the shadow is creeping down to get you, and meeting with it on the side of a cliff doesn't come close to making your bucket list. In fact, you've got a sinking feeling it might kill your chances of finishing that list. Though let's be honest, the only buckets on your list are KFC's popcorn chicken bucket and Popeye's 8-piece mixed bucket.
And so, you decide the best thing to do is use your gut to your advantage and jump. You run a few feet into the cavern, turn around, and take a running leap into the void. As you begin to dive, a shadow falls upon you!
"Ack! Give a guy some warning before you jump out of a cliff like that next time! I almost piggy-backed your head with my ass, buddy," says the man now floating next to you.
Your free-falling partner is a large, round fellow with skin the color and texture of a hot pink bouncy ball. He is completely hairless on his head and his chest, which glistens in the sunlight. On top of his head sits a neon blue miter at least half as tall as him. The man's loose, golden pants are flapping in the wind much like the skin of your double-chins. His hat shouldn't be able to stay in place with all the falling and wind, but, well, there it is.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer," he says. "The name's Timtam, by the way."
He waits for you to speak your name, but you are too busy gasping for air. Your heart is pounding even harder than usual. If only you were in better shape, maybe this wouldn't be so stressful. But, you just had to eat Chipotle twice a week. With chips! And a large coke! That wasn't diet! You feel all those extra burritos conspiring with gravity to make you fall faster.
"That's all right. We're all entitled to our secrets. So. Very. Entitled. What are you doing in these parts? Heading to Djinnfest?"
You shrug to express your confusion.
"I know, I know. It seems like every Djinni and their lamps are going to Djinnfest these days. Every year, I tell myself it will be the last year, but I end up going anyway. Hey, do you think could you spare me some salt? I'm famished."
You check your pockets, but don't find any salt. You are surprised, since you usually have a few extra packets left over from an In-n-Out adventure. They just never seem to make their fries salty enough for you.
"Well, damn. What kind of Djinn worth his salt doesn't carry any extra salt for emergencies?"
You explain that you aren't a Djinn, you've never heard of Djinnfest, and that you're really sorry, usually you have some extra salt.
"Ah, well, that explains a lot. This falling would be a bit of a problem for you then, wouldn't it?"
You look below you to find the ground a whole lot closer than it was when you decided to jump. The white "clouds" below glint under the sunlight. In reality, they are huge white crystals, like scraggly teeth jutting out of the earth. And they are hungry for a poor soul's blood and flesh to be spattered all over their shiny sides.
"Hokay, tell you what, my friend," the Djinn says, "I'll save you with some magic, but it'll cost you. Normally, I'd just ask for some salt, but, well.. you know. We can work something out. So, make a wish! You've got about five... four..."
If you:
Wish you hadn't jumped out of that cave, click here
Wish to survive your stupid, impulsive decision that you still totally stand by, click here
Screw wishes! You don't owe favors to anybody! (Kat has dibs).
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